A Dream and a Trip Game Changing

There are moments, in a person's life, that change everything. Most change that happens in life happens gradually- that's a realistic picture of the nature of change. However, sometimes something happens, that alters our perspective in a significant way. For me, I've recently had two such moments- the trip, and the dream.

In the trip, it was like I found myself. I realized that I had... some desires that I was ignoring. I found a school I wanted to go to for graduate studies. I found a church I wanted to be a part of. In the midst of these discoveries, I found... myself. Yeah, I found myself, in a way I hadn't anticipated. Some of the post traumatic stress disorder went away. I was at peace. I discovered rest. It was good.

The other life-changing event, was a dream. To put perspective on this, I was... really, really upset with someone. I didn't like how they were handling things, and honestly... I really didn't know what to do. Last night, though... I had a dream. In that dream I had a conversation with this person. Somehow, this dream defused my anger. I don't know if a dream has ever had that effect on me, of calming me down. I was ready to move far away out of anger, or at least with anger being one of the motivators. Now... I'm closer to being at peace, of letting go. I still don't understand, why this person handled things the way they did, but I'm coming to realize that needing to understand isn't necessarily a prerequisite to moving on. What does the word say? "Love is patient... love is kind... love is not easily angered... love doesn't boast." Yeah, I don't know that all the anger is gone. Peace will still be a challenge. However, the vindictive edge to it has passed on. I'm calm, ready to move forward. I want to get back to the life I once had. I've still lost a close friend, but I've discovered a deeper understanding of what true friendship is. And... I think I'm coming to grips with just being me. I don't even know for sure what that means, and yet I feel it is accurate.

Life... life is only going to get better from here. That I believe. There are things I want to do, and now I'm going to try to spend my life in ways that make sense. I want to bring to life one of my favorite quotes- "Get busy living or get busy dying- that's God's honest truth." I think it's time to get busy...

Sincerely,
Sean