Being a Giant

 Everybody chooses what kind of person they are going to be.  Are they going to be willing to make a stand when it counts?  Or are they going to be pushed over?

I think... in life we have to decide what kind of people we are going to be.  There will be situations where we have to make a choice about whether we are going to make a stand.  Sometimes it pays to let things go, but if that is our defining characteristic- that we never make a stand even when it's something worth making a stand for, then we will never get anywhere.  How can you tell the difference?  You need to look at the big picture.  How will making a stand here, or letting this go, affect the kind of person I become?  Is making a stand here going to have a significant role in where I end up?  

I remember a situation, where I was kind of screwed over by the court system of Idaho.  I sent the letter about the ticket, including money for the fine, in a timely manner.  They conveniently misplaced it, and didn't "find" it until I called them about the letter they had sent me about the fact that, according to them, I didn't pay their fine.  They didn't offer to send the letter to the judge or offer to help me.  Now in hindsight, part of me regrets not forcing the issue.  I do have to remember though- as annoying as how it worked out was, the truth is I probably was only going to get $20-$30 back from my fine.  Would that have been worth the fight?  That's hard to say.  I admit it- rather than press them about the crap they were feeding me about how they didn't receive the letter in a timely manner, I just let it go.  And truthfully, I can honestly say there wasn't much at stake there.  That probably wouldn't have been worth the fight.

On the other hand, right now I'm in a fight to get my therapeutic needs met.  The agency I'm working with is trying to tell me I can't see an outside therapist, when the therapist they set me up with was useless.  I think, in this scenario, it is ABSOLUTELY worth the fight, because it is my own mental health that is at stake.  I'm going to fight tooth and nail to get the therapy that I actually need.  I can see that the treasure on the other side of me getting this need met is no small thing and I've got to get this need met.  Can you see the difference?  It's the size and scope of the treasure.  If you can evaluate the end result, you can make an effective decision about whether something is worth fighting for.  If something is worth fighting for though, if you don't fight for it, you are no giant.  You are a coward.  But if you fight for the things that matter, then you can be a giant, which I would hope everyone would aspire to.  Whatever you want in life, you should fight for making your needs get met and for becoming the type of person that people will really be grateful to have around.  Be a giant.  Stand for what is right.  Don't let others push you around when it comes to principles and things that are really important.  Let go of the unimportant things.  Be a giant.

Imagine Being In Someone Else's Shoes

 I think... our culture teaches us to judge others more than try to put ourselves in their shoes.  Sometimes it pays to use a little imagination.  I have an example.

I was on Twitter, and I saw that some woman was complaining bitterly about child sex dolls.  Now am I a fan of child sex dolls?  NO.  Am I glad they exist?  Well, as I'm about to explain, I have decidedly mixed feelings about them.  Anyhow, this person was under the impression that people use child sex dolls as a like a... 'gateway drug" to pedophilia.  Me, I have a hard time imagining a teenage boy with sexual feelings purchasing a child sex doll because they want to see what it's like being a pedophile.  I'm pretty sure very few, if any, child sex predators are born this way.  More likely though, I see a guy who has already gone to prison for sex crimes against minors thinking "I don't want this to happen again.  How do I make sure I never have sex with a minor again?"  And then the lightbulb goes off- what if they had sex with a doll instead?  And then they go and buy a doll, and then when they have the craving for this horrible thing, rather than having sex with a child, which would be horrible, instead they have sex with a doll.  Is this good?  No.  But is it better than the criminal attacking a child?  Decidedly yes!  

When we are thinking about subjects like this, I think we need to try to put ourselves in other's shoes.  I think we're so focused on what something looks like that we forget what it is.  We think a convicted sex offender buying a doll off the internet is horrible, except it prevents actual sex crimes, which would be much worse.  We are worried about teenage girls having abortions, but it prevents teenage girls from raising children that add to the criminal population.  We care about what it looks like, more than what a thing actually is.  I think... we as Christians ought to learn to see the world through other's lenses and really try to put ourselves in other's shoes, or we'll make laws that are unjust and treat people as subhuman.  That was never Jesus's way.  Jesus cared about people where they were at, and tried to work with what people struggled with.  We need to be the same way. 

Favorite Basketball Player

 I realize that this might seem like an odd topic for Christian blog, but... I was watching an interview of Kevin Hart and realized that I'm not sure I have a favorite basketball player.  I think, for me the bar is too high of what I consider respectable.  Let me continue.

Now, Kevin said in his interview "Michael Jordan is my favorite player."  That's great, as far as it goes.  The thing is, for me, if I know anything about a person, their character is at least as important as their ability to perform.  Michael Jordan... he... he's not really cool about how he treats other people.  I watched "The Last Dance," and I learned from that that Jordan was easily offended, and his favorite way to channel that anger was by destroying and humiliating his opponents.  That kind of anger...  he has an unhealthy obsession with destroying anyone that offends him.  Sure, he did it on the court.  But I can't respect someone like that.  He wasn't fun to be around when he was on your team at practice, either.  You are only as good as you treat the people around you.  If you treat the people around you like shit, even if it "works," it's not cool.  I could never look up to someone like that.  That's not a model I want for anyone.  The "win at all costs" model of life stinks.  I can't call Michael Jordan my favorite basketball player, because he sucks as a human being.

So who then?  I've thought about Magic Johnson.  He played for my favorite team, the Lakers.  I think Magic is alright.  Is he my favorite though?  That's hard.  I THINK Magic had sex with women when he was on the road, and while he may not have been married to Cookie at that time, he was in a long term relationship with her.  I don't know.  Maybe my bar is too high for favorite player.  I know I enjoy interviews of Magic, and I know Magic is a classier guy than Michael Jordan.  Maybe it seems a bit unrealistic for me to expect my favorite basketball player to be chaste while in a long-term relationship, but to me... being faithful to the woman you love is like the minimum requirement to being a decent human being.  I want the minimum.  I'm not sure Magic qualifies.

I could pick Kobe.  Kobe was actually caught cheating, and had to admit to it to the press.  The sad part is, I HOPE that it wasn't a rape too- but enough garbage has been thrown at Kobe over what happened in Colorado.  Kobe has gone to meet his maker, and I really hope that meeting went well.  I do have a lot of respect for how hard Kobe worked on his basketball game, and I think Kobe honestly tried to be a man of integrity.  Kobe was intense, but I didn't sense in him quite the degree of ruthlessness that you saw in Michael Jordan.  Honestly though.  When I say I want a FAVORITE basketball player, I want someone I can really respect- someone who not only was a good player and a hard worker, but conducted their personal life beyond reproach and genuinely cared about the needs of others and really was righteous.  Maybe my bar is too high, but... I'm not sure I want Kobe as my favorite player either.  

I have thought of a player that might fit the bill.  AC Green.  AC Green actually has several things going for him- he is a serious Christian who was involved in a church I used to attend.  He even played at Oregon State, my alma mater, and was a Laker.  He stayed a virgin throughout his playing days, so that's commendable.  I haven't seen any interviews of AC to really know what to think.  For some reason, I think he's too easy a pick.  Maybe I should pick him.  I just... I want someone to be my favorite basketball player who I could consider a real-life hero.  Maybe that bar is too high.  I think I want too much.  I want to see a player that is good because they work hard, like Kobe, but also conduct their personal life beyond reproach and really are an awesome person.  Maybe I just can't handle having a favorite basketball player.  We have too few genuine heroes in life I think.  Hopefully, some day, someone will step up and be truly awesome in every way.  Maybe it's too much to ask, but here's hoping.